Book Review ‘ Lady, you are not a man!’ – Apurva Purohit

Apurva Purohit’s book ‘Lady, you are not a man!’ is about the struggles of an Indian woman tangled between work and home. Released in March of 2013, the book quickly rose to become a bestseller. This book is a great read and would sound familiar to any Indian working women. It talks about the battles and the difficulties a woman in India encounters being a woman working and managing home.

The writer Apurva Purohit is the President of one of India’s most successful media groups, the Jagran Prakashan Ltd, which owns publications like the Inext, Dainik Jagran, Inquilab, Mid Day, and Radio City. Through the years, Apurva Purohit has been involved with some of the largest media groups like Zee TV, television segment of Times of India, and Radio City.

Let’s get back to the book and why you should read it as a working or professional woman. Besides being a deeply immersive book, it will teach you to strike the perfect harmony between work and life. Something we all struggle at some point and want to achieve. 

The book teaches life lessons while being filled with real-life stories and encounters of the writer. As I read through, I found the book engaging with the stories and the witty anecdotes that made the book even more useful. The writer is very focused in her narration and at no point, you feel the story is sidetracking.

The book is segregated into three parts – Acceptance, Adapting, and Achievement. 

• Acceptance – “Before any great achievement comes the acceptance of your particular reality – and then you learn to adapt to it, to use it to excel and fly”.

Acceptance part begins with this thought provoking statement.  Apurva emphasizes the fact that we have to accept that as a woman, we are not the same as a man – biologically and mentally. There are some traits and characteristics which are in us as women. We need to embrace them unreservedly. She elaborates further on being good at multitasking, having guilt pangs, putting others in front of us in priority as some of the traits. 

• Adapting – “Adapt yourself to reality – and then you will be able to mould reality to what you want.”

Once we accept ourselves with our positives and negatives, next comes Adapting to given situations and using them as stepping stones to our advantage instead of letting them being hurdles. Adapt to whatever situation life throws at you, take advantage of opportunities, and learn to stay optimistic and make the most of every situation. She stresses on importance of hard work, effective networking and prioritization of tasks. She also talks about asking and getting help and creating an effective support system around us to take help us focus on tasks at hand.

• Achievement – “The final Stage. A sense of accomplishment – hard won but oh so sweet!”

The final segment, a sense of accomplishment. We need to feel gratitude towards benefits and privileges we have received. She also gives us directions about maintaining our individuality and building a good reputation. She makes a very important point about men in general. As bosses, we have to understand how our male subordinates must be treated differently for the success of our projects. She narrated the importance of mentoring next generation of men so that they grow up to respect and treat women as equals.

The book intentionally or unintentionally outlines the three stages of the life of a female. In the early phase of life, a girl learns the physiological and psychological differences with the other gender. When in mid-age, she has to adapt to the change in life with a new family, kids, work, etc. And as a mature woman, she has a sense of accomplishment having succeeded in her own career, played a role in her children’s success, and is hopefully content with life so far.

As a working woman, we can easily  correlate with the book. The book makes us feel like the story is about us, which is what the author set out to achieve. ‘Lady, you are not a man!’ also shares a lot of life tips for both work and home. Yet, it’s not a serious book, it is filled with humorous anecdotes that will not have you giggling but the stories will certainly crack a smile.

Overall, this is a great book with real-life experience, crisp, humorous, and once you are done reading you will be left with a good feeling and positivity. A great book you can finish during the weekend.

So, if you haven’t got your hands on the book, Lady, get it today.